There is a LOT out there about change. This weekend I actually fought a bit with the concept of change, to be honest, I have been struggling with change of epic proportions in my personal life. I’m sure you have a relationship, job, hobby, goal or health challenge right now that is demanding you to change in a BIG way, and you just don’t know if it’s going to be a good thing or a bad thing.
I have been having that kind of struggle in my life, and this weekend I was led to my answers, and I thought, let me change with you some thoughts on change that can help you make your mind new.
… They totally helped me!
It’s NOT that you don’t know how to change. Honey, you just don’t want to.
Most of the time we KNOW we have to change, we KNOW what we need to change too… But we don’t really want to. And so, we say things I don’t know how to make it happen.
If you want to free yourself of the pain you have right now, start by becoming very honest with yourself.
Change for YOU. Not for other people, not for a lifestyle, not for a reward and definitely not for a “result”. We are rarely truly motivated by something we won’t experience for a long time. Also, a lot of people confuse wanting a different result with changing…. Wanting a different result and doing the SAME thing over and over is the very definition of madness.
Stop. the. MADNESS!
Change your internal structures. Your gut is like the center of your emotional brain… Just pick up the book The Maker’s Diet and you’ll see. Now, your gut may be used to a certain pattern of emotional upset, a cycle you have become SO used to that you are blind to the fact that it’s become the filter with which you process the world. And so, people who want to have a better relationship with their parents, for example, end up giving up because their parents STILL step on their toes. Often, they’ve forgotten that in showing honor we should take the lead and so changing HOW they do their relationship will actually give them the results they want, not changing the people or bending over backwards.
Don’t bend, you are NOT a contortionist, you can adapt which means taking a new mutually beneficial path. Which often involves being still, forgiving and asserting boundaries that respect your needs.
Don’t follow your heart too closely. The heart is a liar, most of the time it will crave harmful things (from Cheetos to that married chiseled abs gym instructor). Not all the things that come up in your heart are dreams from God. A lot of people fool themselves and end up hurting, breaking and smashing themselves to pieces because they follow their self-deceit. Instead, search deeper, because often you will have values and standards that condemn the very things you suddenly crave. Listen to those before hand delivering any whim your heart comes up with.
What is your favorite change quote? I’d love to know!