Sometimes you get bad advice with the best of intentions that STILL ultimately has the right message. Granted, you may have to flip it. One time, about a year ago, I was sitting at a table flabbergasted at the advise a seasoned business person I had a lot of respect for was giving me. I’ve heard many versions of it before, none ever applied directly to me, but still. A message heard previously about a woman using her beauty to get ahead…
Mind you, this advise is given to a LOT of women who have very well pleasing faces and shapes. From insinuations that had I been childless I would have been provided for directly by the adviser in exchange. Darn, should have not had ‘m (yeah, right…). To recommendations of using my training to network UP and find a wealthy sugar daddy abroad.
Yes, those. were THE. Advises.
As I sat respectfully maintaining brave eye contact I dove into some self-reflection. I’d never heard this advise used for me personally. Up to that point it was always too bad you’re fat, this is a hindrance because you have flaws.
The construct was delivered in several layers, in the form of a rant, so there’s a lot that cannot be possibly flipped around to sound okay. But the core thinking was: use your beauty to advance in life.
Advance Like Queen Esther
There’s a right and a wrong way to use beauty for advancement, certainly at the time all I could think is this is insanely hilarious — and wrong. However, as time passed I was reintroduced to Queen Esther. Queen Esther gained a seat at the table of the King by excelling in a beauty contest. Her beauty though, was only made that much more profound by her wisdom, rooted in her God.
In fact, there is so much more to learn from that incident, it’s just NOT available in our westernized “New Israel” belief system — Yep! I said it. A lot of us have followed a neo “israelite” belief system, a variance, a sub-category and really a counterfeit copy of the whole, because after all, there are more books in the bible than the ones you remember by heart. While we’re on that topic, such was the limitation placed on the view of this neo israelite movement, we know only a fraction of how God’s nation in the bible lived their faith. All the while claiming we have been called to be the New Spiritual (
makes sense, right?
And Israelite women, were never subservient (Read Proverbs 31) nor was their beauty muted and hidden (God blessed Job with daughters of beauty not seen before or after). Queen Esther got to command the room and make the King hear her in behalf of her people to right a wrong.
I now think there isn’t anything inherently wrong with advancing using beauty when it is backed by the right intentions, diligence and work-ethic. Also known as wisdom.
How Beauty Can Tip The Scales
Let us for a minute forget all the things about beauty and women that have been demonizing women for centuries. From painting Eve as merely entirely gullible like a poorly drafted character meant to be ignored, accused and blamed for the displeasing plot twist. Eve is often portrayed as MORE fallen than Adam, and incapable of any advancement from that predicament — game over Eve and all her daughters…
To the modern day power hungry sleep her way to the top tits & ass trophy wife with the commonsense of a 7 year old. These messages have been embedded into our minds as cautionary tales, not because beauty is corrupting and evil, no it is because it is powerful. It can mean the difference between life and death for entire nations.
Flipping Bad Advise
Ultimately, that rant/advise given to me 12 months or so ago was actually good, thanks to applied wisdom. And this is key. If you have heard all your life that you’re possibly a corruption agent because your face, shape and poise says grace and captivates the attention, you need to cling to wisdom and let your Father who made you so be your only adviser and judge. He reveals!
After all He promises in his word:
The way of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, which shines ever brighter until the full light of day. Prov 4:18
Such is with any word you receive, at first a mere gleam, that gradually gets brighter until it is in full display and undeniable. Maintain an open mind at all times, save words and ask God to give you a new useful blessed meaning intended for you. Sometimes the tools used to whisper, taint the message, that doesn’t change God’s wisdom.
If. YOU. Seek it.